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Domestic violence – how to spot it

It is a common misconception that domestic violence is categorised by punching, kicking or using physical violence. In truth this is never the sole abuse that many victims suffer and only usually occurs later in an abusive relationship.

There are many warning signs that can lead to a physically abusive relationship. These may include your partner:

  • controlling your money;
  • deciding what you wear and eat;
  • deciding who you spend time with;
  • forcing you to have sex;
  • becoming jealous of you and your life;
  • having sudden mood swings;
  • putting you down; and
  • blaming their faults on you.

Many partners may not realise that what they are doing is hurtful and can be helped with their behaviour. We advise that if you feel you may be in an abusive relationship or are concerned about how your partner’s behaviour is changing you should contact Refuge‘s domestic abuse helpline.

If you are in immediate threat of violence you should call the Police by dialling 999. We are always happy to help and you can contact our department 24 hours a day on 07952 053470. For further advice please contact Dee Aktar on 020 7426 0400 or email

The contents of this article are for the purposes of general awareness only. They do not purport to constitute legal or professional advice. The law may have changed since this article was published. Readers should not act on the basis of the information included and should take appropriate professional advice upon their own particular circumstances.

Dee Aktar, Miles & Partners Solicitors, London

Dee Aktar


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